


i'm a fucking mess, but at least i have you by my side

by exotictragedy



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Couch Cuddles, Cuddling & Snuggling, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Drabble, Established Relationship, Fluff, I Swear A Lot, M/M, Sleepy Cuddles, So yeah, based of a tweet, i dont know how to tag for shit, like some serious, or anything i write for that matter, so if thats something that offends you i wouldn't recommend this, this is basically a, um, um this is basically a lot of, um this is sort of canon i guess idfk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-12
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-12-01 04:54:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11479032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exotictragedy/pseuds/exotictragedy
Summary: This fic is loosely based off of Dan’s recent tweet:“if you’re too hot why are you wearing a sweater??” if i prefer to just wear underwear and a hoodie it’s my choice and you should respect it





	i'm a fucking mess, but at least i have you by my side

**Author's Note:**

> A/N
> 
> so, i'm like super insecure on posting stuff online after past experiences i've had, but here we go. please be nice. hope you enjoy.
> 
> xx

Dan woke up cold to an empty bed. 

Phil was always better at overcoming jet lag than him, and without him curled up beside him, their legs tangled under the covers, Dan found himself shivering, still not quite used to the air conditioner blanketing the room with a layer of cool air that seemed foreign and unnatural to the heat of the summer he’d grown to expect.

Donning a jumper and not bothering to put on any pants, Dan made his way into the lounge, where sunlight was already streaming through the floor to ceiling windows, making the room glow with the light of midday.

Phil, already two cups of coffee into the morning, was wide awake, sunken into the sofa, scrolling through twitter on his phone as reruns of an old tv show played in the background.

Dan immediately curled up against Phil, burying his head in the crook between his shoulder and his neck, mumbling a soft, “Good morning,” into Phil’s t-shirt.

Phil chuckled, “Well, it’s hardly morning anymore, but I'm glad you’re finally awake so I can watch something besides reruns." 

It had become a sort of unspoken rule between the two of them, where they would never watch anything new without the other, but Dan still smiled regardless.

As Phil started to pull up a new episode of the anime they were currently watching, Dan reluctantly dragged himself away from him in desperate need of a cup of coffee.

“You could have woken me up, you know,” Dan said softly, as he snuggled back into Phil’s side, feeling slightly guilty for making him wait so long for him to wake up.

Phil sighed, as if he’d expected Dan to bring this up, “No way,” he said fiercely, “you looked to goddamn cute and cozy. And besides, you need the sleep.”

“But if I keep this sleeping pattern, I’ll never get back to normal,” Dan whined. “If you wake me up, I’ll be tired as fuck throughout the day, and then basically be forced to go to bed at the right time again.”

Phil didn’t say anything for a moment, taking a moment to gather his thoughts, before turning to face Dan, with a sigh.

“The thing is, this happens every time we get back. You ask me to wake you up, only to complain for the remainder of the day and get mad at me for waking you up.”

He paused, closing his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers, as if he didn’t want to say what came next.

“If you want to fix your sleeping pattern, you’re going to have to do it yourself this time. I can’t do it anymore. I can’t have you whining at me all day for doing exactly what you wanted me to do.”

Dan wanted to argue back. He wanted to say that it would be different this time and promise that he could change, but he knew it was a lie.

Dan was already not a morning person, without the jet lag to fuck up his sleep schedule, resigning himself from any form of communication until he had at least one cup of coffee in his system.

In that sense, he and Phil were the same, and they knew to keep to themselves in the morning until they were both awake enough to start the day. They knew to respect each other’s space in order to avoid pointless conflict or spats about the most minuscule of things.

Dan’s thoughts were a whirlwind of chaos and he berated himself for being such a shit partner. Phil was too good for him. Phil was the most caring and generous person Dan had ever met, and knew exactly how to love and cherish Dan. He treated Dan like he was the most important person to have ever graced this earth, always knowing just what to do and what to say when Dan was feeling down or upset, and Dan knew he didn’t deserve him; but, by some unlikely twist of fate, he had somehow ended up with him anyways.

“Sorry.”

It was barely a whisper, but he knew Phil heard him. Dan’s gaze was focused on his hands as he fiddled with his fingers in his lap, refusing to look up.

He felt a hand on his leg, and a gentle squeeze. 

Phil knew him so well; knew he had let his thoughts spiral out of control, and without saying a word, he picked up the remote and rewinded the episode to the beginning. 

Phil always knew what Dan needed without anything being said.

“Thanks,” Dan whispered again, pulling his legs to his chest, retreating into himself, making himself as small as he could, as he focused his eyes on the tv. 

He wasn’t going to make Phil rewind again. 

He wasn’t going to make Phil wait all morning for him again, either. He was going to wake up regardless of what time he went to bed and suck it up.

“Come here,” Phil stretched out an arm; an invitation for Dan to melt into his embrace. 

Phil always knew what to do. Phil knew him so fucking well.

~~~

As the sun rose higher around mid afternoon, and the clouds retreated from the clear blue sky, the warm rays of summer flooded through the windows, casting a glare on the television and causing the lounge to become hot and sticky as if it were an oven set to bake.

Both of them had yet to move, only to have sunk further into the sofa, eyes glued to the screen.

“Ugh, it’s so fucking hot,” Dan complained as he snuggled in closer to Phil. 

“You’re fucking hot,” Phil giggled, poking Dan’s side, making him squeal.

“Shut up,” Dan said, swatting Phil’s hand away from him. “You’re just saying that because you’re my boyfriend and you have to. Right now, I definitely look like a sweaty rat who needs a shower.”

“I mean if you took off that jumper I’m sure you wouldn’t be having this problem.” Phil countered, rather suggestively.

Turning his head towards Phil, mouth gaping open, Dan gasped, “Excuse you, that has _nothing_ to do with this. I should be able to wear whatever I want; it’s _my_ house. If anything is making me all sweaty it’s _you_ , the human embodiment of a space heater.”

“ _Our_ house,” Phil corrected almost instantly. “And I can move away if you want,” Phil teased, with a sly look on his face as he started disentangling himself from Dan. “I mean _I_ seem to be doing just fine, snuggled up with you, but _if_ you insist.”

Phil was standing up now as Dan was reaching up, making grabby hands, “That’s not what I meant, come back!” he pouted, sticking out his lower lip.

“Nope, not until you’re showered. I heard somewhere that my boyfriend was a sweaty rat that needed a wash.” Phil was grinning now.

Dan crossed his arms and heaved himself off of the sofa, traipsing past Phil into their bathroom.  

“I hope you’re happy!” He shouted across the flat, only to hear laughter in response.

~~~

Being the stubborn little shit that he was, Dan toweled off only to put on another jumper. He smirked at himself in the mirror, fully aware that he was being ridiculous and Phil was right about the whole ordeal, but he couldn’t help himself.

As he made his way out, he immediately felt like a dick, smelling stir fry wafting out of the kitchen. He was about to turn around and go throw on a t-shirt, but Phil had already seen him.

“Oh my fucking god, Dan,” Phil sounded exasperated. “Are you really _that_ childish.”

Suddenly Dan found his feet really interesting, “Sorry, I didn’t realize you were cooking, and you’re so sweet and I don’t deserve you and this was such a dick move. I was just trying to be silly, but god, I’m the worst. I’m so sorry. I was about to go change before you saw me, but it was too late, and I’m sorry, oh my god.”

He was rambling almost to a point it was incoherent, before Phil said, “Stop. Dan, don’t you ever say you don’t deserve me. Yes, I agree, this was a dick move, but that does not amount to being undeserving. If anything it’s the other way around.”

Timidly, he glanced up, “I’m going to go change.” 

On his way back to their room, Dan looked over his shoulder at Phil, “You’re the best, you know that.”

“I do. Now go get changed so we can eat. I know you haven’t eaten yet today and I can’t have my boyfriend starve to death before I’m able to proclaim to the world how much I love him.”

Blushing, Dan ran to the wardrobe, swiftly throwing on a t-shirt.

~~~

As night fell, and they made their way to bed, Dan wrapped himself around Phil, running his fingers up and down the pale expanse of Phil’s arm, nuzzling his face into the back of Phil’s neck. Grabbing his hand, Phil laced their fingers together, squeezing tight for a moment.

“I love you, you know,” Dan breathed into the soft skin at the base of Phil’s hair.

Phil shivered, “I know.”

“I just know I can be a dick sometimes, or difficult to be around with all my bad habits and unhealthy coping mechanisms and tendencies, but you always know exactly what to do, and you’re always there, and I love you so fucking much that it hurts.”

Phil twisted out of Dan’s embrace, turning to face him, pecking him briefly on the lips before whispering, “All those things are so insignificant at the end of the day; and, to be honest, I can’t begin to fathom what I would do without them, because without them, you wouldn’t be you, and _you_ are the person that I’m in love with, not some perfect version of yourself.”

He kissed Dan again, pulling back with a smile. 

“There’s no one else I would rather put up with than you, even if you annoy the shit out of me sometimes.”

Hugging him close, Dan pressed his lips to Phil’s cheek, murmuring, “Thank you.”

**Author's Note:**

> um if you want, feel free to come say hi to me over at exotictragedy.tumblr.com 
> 
> xx


End file.
